And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
