Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
