oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
