I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
