I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
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