i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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