apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
