You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
