Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Randomize
