her vagine was all disorganized.
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Randomize
