Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
you will always have a special place in my vag
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Randomize
