Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Randomize
