she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize
