Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Randomize
