Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
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