You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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