So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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