Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
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