Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize
