I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Randomize
