i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
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