he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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