It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
