is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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