Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
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