Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
