OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
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