Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
