White coat. Heels.
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
