If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Randomize
