I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
