try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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