I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Verdict: uncircumcised.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
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