So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
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