can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
