Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
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