you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
