What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
