I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
