omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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