So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Randomize
