ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
Randomize
