I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Randomize
