Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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