He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
