I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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