I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Randomize
