there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
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