Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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