this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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