I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
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